The biggest snake farm and the biggest scorpion ranch are in the works

The Russo Brothers and their collaborators in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, MCU must accept the blame for inadvertently creating in my neighbour an obsession to build the biggest snake farm and the biggest scorpion ranch. He says it is a massive business opportunity. Thrown up by some of our peculiar challenges. He insists it is not the MCU but serendipity that brought the idea to him. Yet I cannot shake off the feeling that the MCU has a hand in his new obsession because he only began to talk about it after seeing the movies, Antman and The Wasp!

He wants me to believe it is not entertainment but agriculture that is currently giving him his high. He admits entertainment is a powerful instrument but agriculture is more powerful. If it is embraced with a strategy and mentality of a five-star war veteran.

What is he looking to build the biggest snake farm and scorpion ranch for? I asked him. He says he wants to make a difference. By exporting snakes and scorpions? I asked further. No, he answered. He wants to provide more employment for snake charmers. You will not believe some of the weird things he tells me in some of our conversations. You just heard one. Of course I told him it was an absurd idea. What’s absurd about creating more employment for snake charmers? Are they not citizens with economic rights as the rest of society? And if they hold the key to ending the protracted war on terror, should we not dive in with boots, gears and all?

My curiosity was aroused when I heard the last part. So naturally, I asked him, “How will snake charmers end the war on terror?” “You don’t think I know that proper intelligence required for the most efficient security systems are not discussed openly?” I didn’t know what next to say. It was checkmate for me. I knew I was in luck when he began to speak again. Consider topography. Consider climate. Consider what they call the surprise element. Consider camouflage. Consider being lethal… I did not know when I stopped him. What suddenly came over him? Was he carried away? He smiled when he saw the look on my face. “Having the all the ingredients is never the issue. Putting them together the way they should is. Didn’t your mama tell you that?”

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