Step aside Agent 007, Agent 00W is the real deal

Step aside Agent 007, Agent 00W is the real deal. She (yes, long before Agent 007 became a lady, Agent 00W was doing her thing) got to me this morning. I had gone to the back of the house for some early morning business when I saw her; in the form of a plantain tree. I knew I had to take a photo. I could not ignore the spectacle. Two huge bunches of plantain hanging across the fence into the next compound. This was not something one sees every day, in a bustling city, like Lagos. I had not figured what I would do with the photo before I whipped my phone out of my pocket and made for the camera to begin clicking away. But I was stopped in my tracks. I thought I heard something. As if the plantain was speaking to me. Uncanny. I knew I was not hearing voices. I looked around, saw no one. And decided to resume the exercise. But I heard the voice again. More clearly this time.

“Why did you interrupt my sleep with your clicking sound?” I didn’t pinch myself. I couldn’t. I just stood there, transfixed to the spot, trying to take it all in. The world must be coming to an end in deed. A Plantain tree starting a conversation with me! How? From where? And this was no Marvel Studio magic. It was real. Of course, I was not allowed to probe around in my head for the most reasonable explanation of what was going on before another question popped out from the trunk of she who must be called Agent 00W, where W stands for Wonder, I assumed. “What are you thinking, and why do you look so?” I did not know if those were rhetorical questions or not. Suddenly I began to feel as if I was being watched by all the plantain trees around. Thankfully, there were no cacophony of voices from the various trees. It was just one tree that spoke to me.

“Do you wonder that you can hear me? Or do you wonder that I am bearing two big bunches of plantain at the same time? Do you wonder that I am the only voice you hear despite the presence of other plantain trees around here? Do you wonder that I am carrying all this weight easily even though I am slightly bent? Do you wonder if I will keep my shape and stay this way until the gardener comes to cut me down and take away the fruit? Do you wonder if I bother about when eyes like yours move away from double-fruit bearers like me, and focus on others you classify as spectacles? Do you wonder what kind of spectacle I am? Do you wonder what place of the wonder spectrum to fix me? Do you wonder how many other wonders abound here? When will you allow wonders take you in. When will you enlist in the wonders enumeration programme? And join those captivated by the true treasures around you? As they prepare for the incomparably refreshing wonder-fest. Who among your circle of friends will begin the ordinary level wonder census of your country? The intermediate and advanced levels have been waiting for ages but your likes have hardly plumbed the corners of the ordinary level wonders around you.

Will you now learn to pause? Will you now learn to listen? Will you now learn to look closely? Observe and acknowledge all the wonder gifts you have been given? And will you give thanks to the Source of all wonders?”

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  1. Pingback: Prime Minister Balewa enjoyed the services of agent 00W. It’s what gave him his depth | Robtakes

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